Hatred and Despising all the work that planned by above....

Why Why and Why

So many bad guys on the run

You took away just misters n misses.nice person?

I really got no idea which point should i see

that u love each one of us from the day we born, n departed from life..

A youngster which only 20 this year..

A nice guy i known

Been taken

Why why and why?

Faith? For you? I've lost long time ago...

Yes i complaint and complaint n complaint....

B'cos we got the right to know what to trust to.

But u treated us like Dolls,

Who should die n who should live...

Once n twice u took away Nice ppl i've known,

but why not those demons on the loose?

Cos u can't handle them?

Or u r the one who actually demon's Master??

I really despising all ur work

I totally hate what your excuses is...

Where's the mercy ppl were talking about you?

Where? where?

A World that build by glacier ice

Lock inside, lock inside,

Inside the world that divided by thick glacier ice.

What and how to knock down this crystal height?

Since the keys to the exit, lost in sight.

Myself build it too high,

Now i got stuck,

And got no way to climb out from this tall glacier pipe.

Even if i succeed to climb that high,

How do i do the way down right?

No way to slide,

No way to jump off and fly.

I asked myself :

Should i stay?

Or should i commit suicide?

Suddenly i realised.

Actually all time the key is with me.

That's the best place to hide,

The trustworthy place in my mind

which is the pocket on my right.

After so many incidents been through in my life..

I think i rather stay inside.

Keep myself guard high.

Instead of letting people make you cry.

Halloween at Fame

It a memorable night, cos yesterday i totally seen who are the beast and who is not, n the worst is, a wolf in disguise.. I learned alot from the night.. Which is there's none of a fairy tale exist.. I thought he is one good guy... until the second he attacked me... lips to lips... and the fucking scent from his mouth n tongue really disgusting!!!!!!!!! Burp.....

And when the night call off... i'm so glad... i finally speak out my mind... Held a massacre n clearify everything in the wrong position back to the basic. Back to where it should be. But once i sensed the fishy of it. That's it, Bye forever. Thanks to Rui, sometimes, i should stand up for my word to them n go strictly, no mercy~! So everyone will get the picture of it. N buzz off!

Final warning, hell yeah!

it's been years

I din notice i still can be touched by an old film, a very romantic love comedy, "My best friend's wedding" I personally love that part when Michael hold Julie on a boat, n sing "The way you look tonight" So romantic scene... And then the part when Julie realized that she lost, confess the whole evil plan n cry... n the funniest part is when she decribed her ownself as fungus~ LOL... And the final touching point is the time when she gave her their theme song "The way u look tonight to Kimmy, n the scene that Michael n Kimmy were touched!! Oh man... that scene always made me tear... cos that part i really feel her losing Michael for real n face the whole thing with courage~! it's really breaking my heart seeing Julie cry.... Shit... since when i become so vunerable? Hmmmm.... Doubtful... Anyway... Just love it.... Love the song n the movie...

XXX-A very good Film~ Shud go for a view guys~ U will get me :) XXX

Co Co the not so original diva/copy cat~ DUH~*

Kinda mad n disappointed with what she showed in the latest album, first the image.... SO GAGA~ I wonder when she will change her name as LADY COCO pulak~ sick sick sick~ Summore u know what worse? She use the original song "Potential Break up song", which is Aly n AJ's hits N now so bored~ after so many days gone, then only she call it her Theme Song... Sweat sweat sweat.... She used to be so orignal... n what happened to her? Hmmmm.... but of course la, i like 3 dance songs from her album, Party time, Ready o not, and 既然爱了.. Shud try em, n dance some sweat out (^_^)

Boooooo.....

Really wish that one day, coco lee will get some original Image, not just another cat from copy street~* Like those days when she really is a Diva

Memories seems not Long Ago, but it's already been a decade

Memories fresh like yesterday,

Almost every details in highschool still carved in my mind.

But when i count those years back..

My fingers pop one by one...

Then only i know that it have been a decade in my life.

He/she is engaged with her Mr. White Horse or his Ms. Fair Lady..

And some even with their Princes n Princesses..

And some even sound ridiculous... Getting divorce...

Fairy Tales seems getting real and real to people around me..

Of course sometimes, being single isn't that bad (^^)

Then only i realise... We're getting older n older...

But it's weird that i din feel anything step into my way to live.... hahah..

M such a moron.... or maybe this is the only way for Singles out there to lie to themselves n get a life without getting thoughts of getting partner anymore???

Hmmm... What's going to Happen next? Who's getting married next? Who will going to get him or herself divorce?

Sound Fun~ ^^

(^O^)

hello~hehe, just wanna show off my 25th Bday

It's been a while i stop writing blog here, cos not much to tell in my life, since there's nothing interesting to say~* but this really touched me, cos it is the biggest bday of all my life...

At first i thought it will be a very small gathering dinner, mana tau... one by one of my friends coming n coming... wow!! Ridiculous.... n Presents getting crowded n crowded...

But of course.. u know la, my stupid attitude, once again ruin the whole thing... in the middle of the party, some moron showed up on my big day, in just 1 second, my wrath came out from no where, i was like blaming at first, then suddenly.... i feel so stupid... how can't i be more generous about it n treat him like a piece of glass.... duh!!! i'm an idiot... i even made the whole gang down... sorry guys... let's skip this la~! But luckily at last, Happy Ending ^^

The happy thing is... i see how much friends can do to each other... how much sacrifice they made... to make me happy n unforgettable night of my 25th bday... touched!!

n these are the pics i captured from that night~ let the show begins ^^



This is my Tiramisu~ Added with my favourite~ Cherry~* Yummy :)


Here come my stupid face~! hahaha~

These are the lovely ppl i mention just now~ ^^
(from Left to right) Jean, Candy, Belle, Me, n NiQ

(from left to right) Venus, Me, NiQ, n Sam


(from left to right) Andrew, Me, n Chia Chia~*

See? How many Presents i got? Damn!! i was touched!!!

Love that Chupa Chups Bouquet!!!

Haha, we're counting how many cherry flavour were inside~

Happy Family~
(from left to right) Jean, Candy, Vincent, Me, Belle, Angelyn n NiQ

When the night was call off, we're so tired, everyone rushed back home n sleep.. so was my mind was thinking... but the suprises, yet ended!!!


TADA!!! Yes!!! My favourite dog breed of all!!! A Pug was waiting in my room!!! MAN!!!! that was so fucking out of my mind!!!! i was leap in!! drop all my presents n rush for it!!

Thanks to NiQ!!! The big spender of the night!!! Wow!!! that's really really touching!!!!


Not much suffering from finding her a name!!! Cos i love Cherry, so~ I gave her Cherry this name~ ^^


Look at her!! She really love to show off her skill of taking pics!! Whenever the camera is ready, she always STUN!! so cute!!! so freaking COOL!!!! ^^


Hmmmm..... So i end here for now.... soon up coming blog... i think will be in a short while nia la~ wait long long la~ hahaha~*

The previous memoirs, Today's Fighter

Years later, the memoirs in my mind still fresh like yesterday, we've been together not long n either short, just simply i've put almost everything in that relationship.. It's like a point to every relationship, y i dun trust anymore o y i dun even wanna spend another cent to my partners.. I used to be stupid like hell, but it's worth it.. today, the idiot misses the previous person so much, just simply he found another one in own's life, i got no right to stop, but at least i get to wish, n see that person happy :) i think i'm not good to anyone either.... so i better back off...



If anyone dare to bully o hurt u, i wish i could be there, to protect n to fight for u...


Ghabryal

刚过的圣诞夜，两年前的圣诞夜。

每个人都有自己的性格吧，而我，总是自己为中心，快乐的季节，却开口大骂两个人，一个应该骂的，所以没什么必要去写什么的。

另一个却因为他一个表情让我性情大变，temperature晋升98度，破口大骂，还差点打起架来。

我自私的一面，却换来了两个人的伤害。

难道每个圣诞日前夕我都必须骂人吗？这个情况让我想起了一个曾经爱我的人在前两年的时候就再次为我那该死的任性。。。我弄她哭了。。。还弄到大家没什么心情的～

现在想起。。我是那么的该死的～哈哈，但是想起来，这一切都是很美的回忆。

The White Roses Garden

Was awaken from sleep by sensing The white roses have changed
and the smell starts to change
then i open my eyes to look for the answer

Weird scene
Some white roses started to turn red n dripping with blood

n what happened to the butterflies?
where r they?

What happened?

Wondering where m i now
I was asleep in the white roses garden
Now i'm awake,
But i cant recognise it anymore
It looks like a maze to me now

Who build all these thick walls while i'm resting?
I start to feel scared
and tried to push down the wall
i feel pain on my palm
my skin was cut opened,
look closely to the walls
it were torns all over.

I shout n shout, asking for help.
But i all can hear is the echo of my voice...

What happened to me?

Sorry for being cruel to you...

On my way back from movies,
On bus sitting next to the window,
staring at the raindrops sliding across the glass.

Here comes something i wanna off talking about.

I thought,
The name that i used to miss so much,
The name i used to care so much,
The name that i used to hurt me so much,
Will never going to hurt o making me tear anymore.

At last the name still comes to me.
Finally shown on my phone screen.

But this time,
Things are so different.
I chose not to argue,
n i chose not to answer the call.

I ignored n ignored,
but the pain inside me is so unbearable..

Seeing your messages,
making me more sad.

I teared in the bus,
And i ignored that stranger who sat next to me.

Tears,
was gliding to my cheeks,
Because i feel your tears.
n at the same time,
all the best memories we had,
starts to rush n replay in my mind.

All i can do now is telling u,
I'm sorry for being cruel this time.
I don't want u to cry,
All i want now is some time.

I love you,
And I still do.

Just simply this time u really hurt me.

And this is the reason I wanna off this relationship for a while,
Making myself clear.

Maybe we're meant to be this way

I cried before i made that decision,
bcos of what?

Do u know?

And do u figure out why?

Maybe we're meant to be this way.

You were someone so much more than just important in my life,
You're just like a baby sister to me.

But the accuses that u written out,
Seriously cut my heart..
And clearly shows that u still dunno the reason why..
What causes all these..

Maybe we're meant to be this way

You said you care,
You said you understand me.

That's what hurts me.

Maybe we're meant to be this way

It's hard for me,
To take this path.

All the facts,
seems like telling me that maybe we're just meant to be this way.

I did love u,
In fact that i still do..
But I'm just a little too tired for all of this.

A very hard decision

"Sad piano play,
Made me cry.

How can i be so stupid all the while,
In believing miracles in friendship to some who is not up for it.

I've forgotten how many nights missing u, wanting u to know my lately,
U always not there for me.
I've forgotten how many messages I've sent out,
But there's always without any reply,
Though, i know u will never reply, cos i know u.

Cos i was still believing in us.
Our friendship.

Hoping one day u will be there for me.

Today
I'd made a very hard decision
That I'm leaving.

Of cos, i still know what happen next.
But are u for serious this time?

Doubtful."

Today, i finally understand. Don't simply take one person out from the group n treat that person as a friend. Cos that might turned out to be a very lethal weapon to ur heart n soul. I've die trying, n failed about accepting how u treating a friend is like.

What a friend knows? Yes, one friend's attitude.

Now I'm giving u a hint, or u can just say it's a big lesson :)

Some human can tolerate whatever a friend treat them, n some amount, just like me, they just like a piece of mirror, how u treat them, they uses the same way to treat u back. Fair n square~ right? :) And when that happen, that's the ending :) And all i can tell u is, I did love u, but I deserve a better friend. So long, n wish u have a better day in future.

Now, whoever read this, take this as a sign, n be good to your friends b4 any mess become mess-ier :)

ＣＯＤＥ ＲＥＤ

ＣＡＴＣＨ　ＭＥ，　ＷＨＩＬＥ　Ｉ　ＳＴＩＬＬ　ＣＡＲＥ．
ＢＥ　ＷＩＴＨ　ＭＥ，　ＷＨＩＬＥ　Ｉ　ＳＴＩＬＬ　ＣＡＲＥ．

ＯＮＣＥ　Ｉ　ＤＥＣＩＤＥＤ，
Ｉ　ＮＥＶＥＲ　ＧＯ　ＲＥＧＲＥＴ．

ＣＨＥＲＩＳＨ　ＭＥ，　ＷＨＩＬＥ　Ｕ　ＳＴＩＬＬ　ＣＡＮ．

抓紧我，当我还在乎时。
也和我一同走，当我还在乎时。

当我一决心，
我不会后悔。

当你还有机会时珍惜我。

What it used to be

Dun ever find some excuse for u to say me bad,
Dun ever make another drama to make me fall.

I had it enough.

What i said is truth,
What i did is the only way out without breaking anything.

Now I'm here to speak out loud,
n make it clear
There's no one caused me for holding myself from getting attached again~

the only thing that made me this way is love.
I've lost my faith in love.

I've lost my count on how many failure of love I've made.

Desperation kills.

I don't wanna keep repeating the same incident/failure again.
That's why i keep holding on.

Please accept the fact that we could only be just friends.

Nothing more
Nothing less

Please let what it used to be,
To stay always.

Boring Trip but I had my perfect rest~

At first, i tot it will be a very interesting trip for me~ mana tau~ my sis' house was far far far away from the city, some where before cyberjaya, a place where they call seri kembangan~ wasai~!!

So nvm~ In this trip~ i bought only few things~ A new sun glasses, a new cap, n also few knit wears from SEED~ the spec was so in my mind all the time after my friend's sister showed me at my comment section in friendster~ Of cos it's not the same, n i guess the price will be very different from the one that she showed me, but almost the same la :) N i love it very much~ now only i realized, i love specs~ This is what bought, it's from sg wang~ hehehhe~

how's that? does that make me looks like a handicapped person?LMFAO~*

So move on to the next thing, ok~ at last i reached my sis house~ n met my cute lil baby girl~ Iman~ heheh~ she is so cute~ but so bad la, this uncle ghab, dunno how to hold a baby, so "chor loh" made u cry nia...hahha.... but so nice la, when i see mom, which means her grandma holding her, she was like so manja~ n so baby~ hahah~ n made me flash back when i was young, being held by her, embraced by her, the feeling is so touching... Another thing, i'm so "beh song" la, even my 2nd sis, also know how to hold a baby... mah leh.. me very lame la~ hahha~ bad uncle ghab~ n these are the pics~

The grandma n the grandchild~

The Uncle n the niece~

The Aunt n The niece~


The last day at my sis house was the hardest day, cos have to say good bye to Iman d lo~ then hurriedly snap few more shots from her n also a video~ but so bad the video was unable to post up... so only can show the pictures of her~ :) ~ hehehhe~ Check it~ so cute~ ngek ngek ngek ngek ngek~*

Adorable~

My spec n her mum's~LOL

after sending my mom n sis up to the bus back to Kedah, my hometown~ next stop will be my friend's house n spend 2 days at his home doing nothing~ sweat... hahhaahha...

This is the guy who offer me a bed to sleep, a shelter to hide from wind n rain lo~ thx so much~ hehe~ n he is Dickson a.k.a. Ah Booy

And that is what's up with my KL trip... boring, but i had a long rest, a very long one.. hahhahah, long time din rest lu...~ n it was so amazing~ back to Penang now, n feel energetic~n fully charged~ hahahaha~ Soon i will get my next trip, dunno where, but it will still be in Malaysia~ ahhahah, no money is like that lo~ plus i haven't fully visit every state in Malaysia yet... So~ Malaysia~ here i come~ hehhee~^_^

End of the trip, this was snapped while on the way back to Penang, one of the perhentian in Ipoh.. i guess.. hahha, not sure where was that, cos that time was so dizzy~ hahha

Andrew the freebie~ Giving out free~!!

ok~ this post suppose to upload a week ago~ Just simply dun have the time to write bout this incident bout this lousy loser~ Drama King of MOMO all time~

Incident happened on 14th of August 2008, i think if mistaken, it was 4 in the morning~ Infront of MOMO~

Can u stand it for a loser which is SOOOOOOOOOOO into clubbing with us~ and drunk himselves everytime we get into the club together or without us, it's been times i scold him, and treating him like a trash~ But that loser just dun understand what i mean~ ok~ so that's it, over my limit again~ Then u just have to accept the actions i'm going to make, yes, bingo~ I slap someone again~ i slapped him infront of my friends~ SO? U dun respect us~ then y shud i respect u?

Look at these lame pictures, how do u feel?

What if we switching the position as u r me, how do u feel? He keep doing all these cheap actions, not once~! trust me~! it's everytime he in the club!!~ What he did? What he did? What he did? What he did?

Ok~here u go~ !!!!!!!!!!

1)Lay str8 infront of the club, entrance of the toilet
2)Knocking his head towards the walls, the chairs inside the club
3)The one thing i cant stand is, his act are more cheaper than the street whores, whores, only selling their body for money, n u? giving out free~ How cheap is that?

Haha~ now suddenly, muse came to me~ give me a new name inside my head~ Yes~!!i got new nickname for u, "Andrew the Freebie a.k.a. Drama King"

Labels Or Love, Big hint, big direction for me~

Big hint for my new level of my new life~I've been thinking for a damn long time, keep on searching for new love n keep on flirting n all~ what is fucking wrong with me? M i that desperate? Before this, ya~ m i that horny? Horny hmmm, maybe i'm~ LOL~ Which cat doesn't eat fish? n which guy doesn't get horny? So just like what Fergie advise~ Why we keep on shopping for love instead of shopping for branded stuffs n all? Of cos it's not bout the brandeds, she is talking about taking things slowly instead of rushing into black holes? rushing~They only hurt u at the end~

But in real, i mean the real Branded still sounds better~ Right? hahha~ So i'm taking things slowly~enjoy every moment of my shopping~Winks~~

I personally love this row~ "It's alot of men i know i could get another" which means i know there's a lot of ppl out there, n i know i could get a better one~


And this is the Lyrics i get from lyric-site, if can~ try to understand it~ it might gives u some direction to change the current way u look at L.O.V.E.~ Now presenting u this~ the lyric~

Fergie - Labels Or Love

Shopping for labels, shopping for love
Manolo and Louis, it's all I'm thinking of
Shopping for labels, shopping for love
1, 2
Manolo and Louis, it's all I'm thinking of
1, 2, 3 Turn the lights on.

I already know what my addiction is
I be looking for labels, I ain't looking for love
I shop for purses while love walks out the door
Don't cry, buy a bag and get over it
And, I'm not concerned with all the politics
It's a lot of men I know I could find another.

What I know is that I'm always happy when I walk out the store, store
I guess I'm Supercalifragi-sexy, nothing to be playing with
I love him, hate him, kiss him, diss him, tryna walk a mile in my kicks

[Chorus]
Love's like a runway but which one do I love more?
No emotional baggage, just big bags filled with Dior
Love's like a runway, so what's all the fussing for?
Let's stop chasing those boys and shop some more.
1, 2, 1, 2, 3, Turn the lights on.

I know I might come off as negative
I be looking for labels, I ain't looking for love
But, relationships are often so hard to tame
A Prada dress has never broke my heart before
And, ballin's something that I'm fed up with
I'mma do the damn thing, watch me do the damn thing
Cause I know that my credit card will help me put out the flames
I guess I'm Supercalifragi-sexy, nothing to be playing with
I love him, hate him, kiss him, diss him, tryna walk a mile in my kicks

[Chorus]
Love's like a runway but which one do I love more?
No emotional baggage, just big bags filled with Dior
Love's like a runway, so what's all the fussing for?
Let's stop chasing those boys and shop some more.
1, 2, 1, 2, 3, Turn the lights on.

Gucci, Fendi, Prada purses, purchasing them finer things
Men they come a dime a dozen, just give me them diamond rings
I'm into a lot of bling, Cadillac, Chanel and Coach
Fellas boast but they can't really handle my female approach
Buying things is hard to say
Rocking Christian Audigier, Manolo, Polo, taking photos in my Cartier
So we can't go all the way, I know you might hate it but
I'm a shop for labels while them ladies lay and wait for love

[Chorus]
Love's like a runway but which one do I love more?
No emotional baggage, just big bags filled with Dior
Love's like a runway, so what's all the fussing for?
Let's stop chasing those boys and shop some more.
1, 2, 1, 2, 3, Turn the lights on.

Shopping for labels, shopping for love
Manolo and Louis, it's all I'm thinking of
Shopping for labels, shopping for love
1, 2
Manolo and Louis, it's all I'm thinking of
1, 2, 3 Turn the lights on.

生活学论 - 数学题

1 + 1 是个很简单的数目题
有些人了解之中的原理
有些人却不会

我们的生活里
其实牵连很多数目的formula

假想，每个人的总数是 1 + 1 + 4999
你就是那个先的 1
而第二个 1 就是你的伴侣
而 4999 是在上天规定你在你生命中必须认识的人和朋友
假如有天 1 + 1 +（4998 - 1）
不就是少了一位朋友吗？
不久后，我很肯定
上天
一定会再加回另一个新人
还会比你少去那个人好
最后还是会 4998 + 1 啊

认识的每个人
都会带有不同的课程让你进修
让你成为更好更强的人

Rainy day, 2nd of September, year 2008

Whole day in my bedroom, doing nothing but watching stupid movies, then i keep download all sad chinese love songs... n i got no idea where the memories out come, made myself moody... feels like everything seems so fresh... the wounds, n the feelings... seems so new again... i can feel the pain when i touch it... m not making myself pathetic, just, all of sudden i feel my life is a disaster n it's so empty... Life without love, what is that shit? but in the same time, what is shit, if the life u have, is to be with someone who doesn't love u at all?

Lately alot of cheapskit i newly met... n some even hide in my msn list for a long time, all in a sudden come over n asking m i still available? since i just break up not long ago.. n the funny is, i din even try to fool them, o let them stay~ N the funny is, what i did wrong to made u missunderstood? How dare u accuse me for fooling u? All the while i treat u is like a friend.. nothing more nothing less.. but y? y u can say such thing to me? do u know how hurt is it to me? Some even funny... already attached, pls stay attached, dun say u like me o some so~ i'm not a toy o a back up ok?

So i took a deep breath, n think what can made me happy again? I str8 off from computer, n went downstairs to buy 2 pieces of cakes, 2 doughnuts, 6 pieces of mini tarts~.. of coz i'm not a blending machine, i just finished 2 cakes, n 2 mini tarts, save them for tomorrow's breakfast. I bought 2 cakes, bcos i din had any cake for 8th of July, my birthday~~So today is re-celebrating my bday~

*~happy birthday to me~*

But so far, my day havent bcos of 2 cakes n switch to happy mode... Too many things stuck in my mind, feel like my mind is going to burst... How can those who create life, created mine this way?

Is there anyone out sale their happy life? I'm willing to buy it...